


Take a Left

by SweetPollyOliver



Category: Cobra Kai (Web Series)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Angst, Biphobia, Bisexual Character, Bisexual Johnny Lawrence, Bisexual Male Character, Canonical Character Death, Character Study, Closeted Character, Coming Out, F/M, First Kiss, Internalized Homophobia, M/M, Online Dating, Season/Series 02 Spoilers, Sexuality, lawrusso endgame, much of the same things happen however
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-10-28
Updated: 2020-10-28
Packaged: 2021-03-09 00:41:06
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,202
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27245920
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SweetPollyOliver/pseuds/SweetPollyOliver
Summary: What if, instead of telling him that he'd been in love with Ali, Tommy told Johnny that he had been in love with him in high school?
Relationships: Carmen Diaz/Johnny Lawrence, Daniel LaRusso/Johnny Lawrence, Johnny Lawrence/OMC, Johnny Lawrence/Tommy (Karate Kid), Miguel Diaz & Johnny Lawrence
Comments: 28
Kudos: 155





	Take a Left

**Author's Note:**

> Content warnings: references to gay bashing, canonical character death (which in this version of events counts as bury your gays), biphobia, internalised homophobia, oblique references to the AIDS crisis, alcohol abuse, some in-character cissexism towards the end

“Man, there was something I never told you. Didn't think you needed to know, but screw it,” Tommy said. “I was in love with you in high school.”

Johnny looked over in shock at Tommy. Whatever he’d expected out of where his friend was going with this it wasn’t this.

“What?” he asked with his mouth hanging open.

“Yeah,” Tommy gave him a tight sideways smile. “Freshman year. And Sophomore year. And Junior year. And Senior. You were the light of my little life. That’s why I joined Cobra Kai. I just wanted to be near you.” 

“Jesus, Tommy, I… I didn’t know,” Johnny said, after racking his brain for something, anything to say to this. “I had no idea.” 

“Of course you didn’t,” Tommy quirked a brow at him. “I worked very hard to make sure that you didn’t.” 

“You could have told me,” Johnny said. “I- I would-”

“You would have beaten the shit out of me,” Tommy said, not unkindly. 

“No!” Johnny replied. “No, I wouldn’t have, I swear.”

Even then, with his heart as poisoned as it had been by Kreese and Cobra Kai, he thought… so few people had loved him. Maybe just his mom and, briefly, Ali. How could he have been mad at someone for that? 

“Well, maybe you would, maybe you wouldn’t,” Tommy waved a hand between them. “I guess we’ll never know now.” 

After a long silence, he couldn’t help himself. Something was gnawing at him.

“Did you let me win in ‘83?” he asked finally. 

Tommy laughed. 

*

Before they went to turn in, Johnny turned back to Tommy.

“Did you ever… you know, did you ever find someone?” he asked, shifting from one foot to another. 

“I did get over you, Johnny,” Tommy rolled his eyes. “But… no, not really. I had a few boyfriends, a few girlfriends, but no one ever… stuck.” 

“I wish you had told us,” Johnny said. “Not even about me, but… we loved you, Tommy. It breaks me up thinking you were scared of us like that.” 

“I know,” Tommy said with a sigh and took his hand to squeeze. “I wish I had too. But I don’t have a lot of time left for regrets.” 

Johnny felt tears prickling in the corners of his eyes and let them fall. 

“You still got that, Johnny, and that's more important than anything. You’ve still got time. Promise me you won’t live your life in a way that leaves you with regrets. Go all in, leave it all on the floor. Promise me.” 

“Yeah,” Johnny said, because what else could you say to that. “I promise, Tommy.” 

*

When the paramedics left and Johnny was clinging to Bobby and Jimmy all he could think of was that the man that had just been taken away in a black bag had loved him once. And that he could have loved him too, if he’d had the chance. 

*

Weeks later, Miguel was setting up a dating app profile for him.

“So what type of women are you looking to meet?” he asked him and, when Johnny looked at him for a long beat, rolled his eyes. “Super hot babes. Dumb question. Okay, what are your likes?”

“Wait, circle back,” Johnny said. “Can it only find women?”

“What do you mean?” Miguel asked. “I mean, it’s for dating, it’s not- oh, _oh_. Uh, no, sensei, I can set it to say you’re interested in men and women. No, uh, no problem.”

Miguel’s Adam’s apple bobbed anxiously as he looked studiously down at the phone and tapped at the screen with his thumbs. Johnny smiled.

“Thanks, kid,” he said. 

*

Men didn’t show up for him to swipe on as much as women did and it gave him a little start every time. At first he swiped left on all of them, not ready yet to see what would happen if he matched with a man ( _pussy_ , he chastised himself. _You promised Tommy_ ). 

He felt a hot spike of shame as he looked at a guy’s picture (he was hot, hotter than the woman he’d been out with last night) and swiped right. Confetti covered the screen. It was a match. 

*

Miguel came over to help him pick out some clothes. 

“This is… not really my area of expertise,” the teen said from the deep recesses of Johnny’s closet. 

“But chicks are?” Johnny said. “You’ve had two whole girlfriends—don’t get cocky.” 

“Shut up,” Miguel stuck his head out of the closet door. “So when’s the last time you went out with a guy?”

“First time,” Johnny said with careful nonchalance. 

“What, really?” Miguel came all the way out into the bedroom and sat down next to him. “Shit. That’s… wow.”

“Yeah, so it took me a while to figure some things out,” Johnny scowled. “I’m making up for lost time now, ain’t I?”

“Yeah, sensei, and that’s great!” Miguel said, a little too enthusiastic. “I didn’t mean to judge, I’m sorry. I’m straight and I was born in 2002, what do I know?” 

Johnny was about to snap back that he was straight too, but then realised that that might sound a little ridiculous when he had specifically asked for the kid’s help to get ready for his date with a man. 

“Probably more than me,” Johnny said with a sigh. 

*

The guy was nice. He was easy to talk to and he bought the first round. 

“Full disclosure, man,” Johnny said, three drinks deep. “I’m new to the whole dudes thing, but I swear: I’m all in.” 

The guy’s eyebrows shot up and he thought about backtracking. He swallowed heavily and took another sip of his beer. His leg was jiggling a little and the guy put his hand on it.

“Thanks for telling me,” he said. 

“Just, you know, in case I suck at this,” Johnny said into his glass. 

The guy squeezed his knee.

“You’re doing fine so far,” he said. “And honestly, sex is just sex, you know? It’s so different from person to person without even taking gender into consideration, so you’re always going to have to reinvent the wheel a little bit. You’ll do fine if you pay attention to the other person.”

“I’ll take that bet,” Johnny said, meeting his eyes, “You know. If you're interested.” 

The guy’s face crinkled in a smile. 

“Yeah, okay,” he replied. “Let me get the tab and we can go to my place.” 

*

Johnny expected to feel different after the fact. Like something had changed or shifted. It hadn’t really. He had a good time, but sex really was just sex, as it turned out. 

The guy (Brian) rolled over to face him. 

“Not bad for a first timer,” he smiled at him. 

He leaned forward and pressed a sweet kiss against his lips. Johnny smiled into the kiss. He reached up and pushed a curl of Brian’s hair behind his ear. 

“Thanks,” he replied when they broke apart. “And thanks for taking a chance on me.”

“What can I say, I like older guys with abs and all their hair,” Brian replied. “Thanks for taking a chance on me too.” 

*

If this were a movie, he probably would have married Brian, but the other man wasn’t looking for anything serious and, honestly, Johnny probably wasn’t ready to _date_ a man rather than just go _on_ a date with one. 

They still met up sometimes though, which was different from dating in a way that Johnny rationalised to himself. 

He went out with more guys too. Men were easier to hook up with than women, which was a life hack (if he was using that right) that Johnny wished someone had told him about years ago. They were all a good bit younger than him, which he didn’t think twice about first, but then one day it hit him why there didn’t seem to be hardly any guys who were interested in guys his age on the apps and he had to sit down for an afternoon. 

*

He didn’t tell anyone else. Not anyone in his life anyway. Miguel knew and he hadn’t had to tell him not to say anything, but he wasn’t ‘out.’ He didn’t know how he would go about doing that. 

Part of him wanted to believe that he never had to tell anyone and that he wasn’t being _ashamed_ by not telling them, it just wasn’t any of their business. 

That was harder to rationalise when he remembered Tommy’s face. _”Didn’t think you needed to know”_ he’d said and for almost four decades Johnny hadn’t truly known one of his best friends in the world. 

When he asked Carmen out, he was tempted to not tell her. Some of the women he had gone on dates with lost interest when he said that he liked guys too, like he was really gay and wasting their time or, worse, like being with guys had made him damaged goods in some way that the rest of him somehow hadn’t. But he liked her. He liked her so much that he wanted her to know him, as terrifying as that was. 

When they were picking out a place, he mentioned somewhere he’d gone on a date with Brian and studied her reaction.

“Sounds perfect!” she said with a smile and his heart lifted.

*

Miguel was in the hospital and might never wake up. The first man who ever loved Johnny was dead and the first person he told that he might have been able to love Tommy back was in a coma. He felt like the kiss of death. 

Three days after he threw his phone in the ocean, Daniel LaRusso turned up at his apartment. 

“Can I come in?” he asked, very politely for the guy who’d kicked the door in last time.

“Sure,” Johnny stepped back and let the other man pass. 

He didn’t know what he wanted, but maybe he’d kick the shit out of him and he’d feel something. 

“Amanda kicked me out,” the other man said finally. “And I’m pretty sure you’re the only friend I’ve got who I can stand seeing me. Ironic, huh?” 

“You want to stay a while?” Johnny asked him and LaRusso nodded.

*

He made up a bed for him on the couch and they ordered take out and drank. They drank a lot. 

“I was trying to do the right thing,” Daniel said. “You know?”

“Yeah, I know,” Johnny replied, all the fight about their duelling ideas of what the right thing was gone out of him long ago. “I don’t know why I thought I could do the right thing. All that second chance shit. Take a right, take a left, what difference does it make?”

“I’ll drink to that,” Daniel lifted the bottle of whiskey they were passing back and forth. “To impotence!” 

“Well, if you keep drinking like that,” Johnny said, taking the bottle from him. Daniel started giggling and dropped his head on Johnny’s shoulder. He felt warm.

“Daniel,” he said finally. “I want to tell you something.” 

The other man was asleep. 

*

The next morning, they sat opposite sides of the small kitchen table nursing hangovers and eating fried food. He wondered if he should ask Daniel when he was going back home, but the words died in his throat looking across at him. Let the poor guy mope for a bit.

“You know, she said that-” Daniel ducked down and stopped talking. “Well, it doesn’t matter. You don’t need to know that shit.” 

Johnny looked up at the other man again.

“What’d she say?” he asked softly.

“She said that it would be easier if I was in love with you,” Daniel replied and his eyes filled with tears. 

Johnny reached over and took his hand and squeezed it. 

“You’re not my type,” he said and Daniel laughed through his tears.

“Yeah, I guess not,” he replied. “My rack is nothing to write home about. And there’s that penis.”

“Who says that’s the problem?” Johnny said lightly and Daniel looked up and his mouth fell open. Shit. 

“Oh,” he replied. “I didn’t know.” 

“Yeah, well, I worked pretty hard to make sure no one knew,” Johnny replied shortly. “But it doesn’t matter anyway. I’m no good for anyone.” 

“Johnny…” Daniel said. 

“It’s okay, I’m not fishing,” Johnny replied. “You don’t need to bullshit me.” 

“Okay,” Daniel replied quietly after a while and went back to eating. 

*

That night, Daniel followed him to his room and climbed into his bed. They didn’t even do anything was the perverted part. Just lay down next to each other and woke up tangled around each other's bodies. 

“I’m no good for anyone either,” Daniel said to the back of his neck, the early morning light seeping through the blinds. “I-”

Johnny rolled around and kissed him. It was too soft, too sweet to be what they needed it to be. It wasn’t cathartic, it didn’t wake Miguel up, or find Robby, or kill Kreese of a heart attack while he was sitting on the crapper. It didn’t fix anything.

Except maybe one thing he didn’t know was broken until that moment. 

“You’re alright, LaRusso,” he said softly.


End file.
